It’s the first day of school and you are sitting in your seat awaiting the arrival of your teacher. Within a few moments, the door opens and in steps…a character from the Chronicles of Narnia. What sort of lessons might you have?

Exmaple: Mrs. Kirtle is truly the most amazing teacher I have ever had.  Sure, she misspells most words with an overabundance of rrrrrs, and her geography lessons seem to consist mostly of the layout of subterrainean realms…but she wears the most beautiful green suit.  In any case, she’s loads better than that creepy assistant she brings with her sometimes.  He never says a word…

Honorable Mentions

Mr. “Voice” by Red Marauder
Our new teacher is…well…well…its hard to say, since we can’t see him. He’s always going on and on about the most obvious things. It’s enough to drive anyone insane (as if that infernal thumping wasn’t enough.) On top of that he has such a peculiar way of doing things. One time he handed out tests that had already been graded (said it saved time afterwards). No complaints here about that, and with all his rambling, there’s hardly ever any time for homework…

Goat Legs by Lexie
I was sitting in my desk waiting for the bell to ring. The bell rang and in walked our teacher.
She was wearing a full legnth skirt, but that didn’t hide the hairy leggs sticking out of the bottom. The girls behind me laughed and said something about a lady never shaving her legs. But I saw the hooves at the bottom of the legs. She was a Faun.
We began with English, which we read The Lion The Witch And The Wardrobe. We moved on to history and learned about the origin of The Dawn Tredder. We moved on to social studies where we studied in depth the lands of Narnia. Our forign language included learning how to say hello to a mermaid.
When the school day was finally over I darted from the room. I got hafway down the hall when I relized that I had forgotten my pencil. I turned around and darted back to the room. A sound stopped me in the doorway. I peaked my head around the door and saw our teacher step into our arts and crafts cabbored at the back of the room. She shut the door on her. I couldn’t figure out why (one know’s never to close the door on oneself when going into a cobboard.) I rushed to the back of the room and opened the coboard door.
My teacher was gone.

the gnome teacher by Hullo Duckie
I don’t think I’m going to like our new teacher. He’s unusually short and has a blobby nose and no toes. He’s quite dry and has a pale sounding voice. His name is Pigglriffin.
He hates it that we live on the “unprotected surface of the world” and is deathly afraid of the sky. He’s always saying “Many sink down, but few return to sunlit lands.”

and the winner

Sheesh! Why do I have such a weird teacher? by Aravir
I thought I had had enough weird teachers until this year. His name is Arsheesh and he’s about as strange as his name. Everytime in geography when we ask what lies north of our country he quotes “the poets” (whatever that means) or if he’s in a bad mood he boxes our ears and tells us to get on with our work. Mainly in biology we learn the different species of fish, in science we’ve disected a fish, and as a field trip we get to go catch fish (which we never get to keep; he always takes it away). He always talks of “the Tisroc-may-he-live-forever” and of a disobediant boy who ran away from him a few years ago. In any case, I am counting the days until next school year!

Don’t forget to check out the winners of the last contest, Good Idea, Bad Idea.