When Narnia holds a fashion show, how might the announcer describe some of outfits or looks of the characters? Inspired by a youtube.com video featuring a Jadis costume (It’s not there anymore, though.) and its description.
Next on the runway, we have Jadis, Queen of Narnia, Chatelaine of Cair Paravel, Empress of the Lone Islands. Her Majesty is sporting battle gear from the new “Ice Rage” collection (As seen in the feature film). The gown is constructed of floor length chain mail, providing a maximum of protection and movement. She is crowned by a golden headpiece designed to mimic a lion’s head and mouth, and this is haloed by the true mane of her nemesis, the Great Lion Aslan. The mane flows down her back and also covers her shoulders, while her arms remain scandalously bare. Twin swords complete this great look, designed to inspired fear in the most doughty of opponents.
Judge’s Note: Ack! I was late this month. Completely slipped my mind. These were hilarious to read. We had a little of everything, including appearances by the High King in his coronation outfit and Puzzle in his lion skin. Here are the winners for this month:
You show e’m, Reep! by preciousjewl
“Ah, here he comes now! Our own Reepicheep from the far east! Look at that rich, lush red cape! Honestly Phil, this guy (or rather, mouse) really knows what he’s doing! Look at how he holds his head up and rests his hand on the hilt of that beautifuly jeweled dagger!” “No kidding, Bob! this is some mouse. Not only is that red cape looking good, but that wild looking hat with a yellow plume in it rather makes him look dashing and bold, wouldn’t you think?” “I have to agree with you, Phil. I have to say I really like this guy’s style, and I really think he’s going to make it to the top ten.”
Black’s the new black by ILuvLucy
Leading the fahions show of the Underworld Wonders is Prince Rilian decked in black amour form head to foot. Not only is this armour great for war and battle but perfect when you want the go above ground. For sensitive eyes it reflects the perfect amount of sun and attracts light away for your eyes so as to experiance little to no pain when going the the surface. Black blends well and is perfect for going out at night and ambushing kingdoms or just going on a stroll in the moonlight. You can’t go wronge with black!
The Fashion Police by Aranel
Lets have a round of applause for the Styling Fauns! Thank-you& Next up, our queen, Jadis! As many of you know, this year shes (thankfully) taken up a new style (last years 70s look was a bit too much for the fashion police) fur, ice, and that pesky no-no color people wide-of-girth avoid: white. Lets give a warmI mean cold welcome to Jadis!
Jadis sashays onto the runway, sporting a poofy white sequined gown with at least ten feet of train dragging along behind her. She has an ice-coated mantle of white fox fur draped around her neck. Her pale arms are bare, but she has a mood ring on her right index finger (a lingering vestige of last years style, perhaps?) and a silver charm bracelet around her left wrist. She wears a tall ice crown that barely misses the ceiling. Jadis smiles and waves, judging the crowds silence to be that of awe and admiration. When no one reacts at all, Jadis pulls out a new accessory: a white sequined, fur-trimmed handbag. The crowd goes crazy, especially the foxes. Suddenly, four minotaurs appear out of the surging throng. Jadis immediately recognizes them as the fashion police.
No! she cries. What did I do wrong this year? Was the crown too much? Oh, I knew this would happen. Please, no!
The fashion police step onto the runway and seize her by the arms.
Nowait&I can explain! shrills Jadis.
The police ignore her and begin hauling her off the stage to cheers from the crowd. Rotten tomatoes splatter at her heels, staining the train of her gown. Moral of the story? Sequins are so out.
and the winner
All Green by Alambil
“And now,” continued the announcer of the Fashion Show for Sinister Sovereigns, “we have viewed evil styles from all ages, from icy blue to mysterious black. Let’s move on to one of the most trrrrrrrrendy ensembles seen in all of Overworld and the Deep Realm. Walking on the runway now is the Queen of Underland, the Lady of the Green Kirtle.” [Applause]
“She is dressed to kill (literally) in bright poison green. If you think this is stunning, you should see her when she’s transformed into a green serpent! To top off her kirtle, she carries a beautifully-made mandolin. Her gown is as stunning and bright as a virid sun, and her–”
And then a voice from the runway, perhaps the loveliest voice you’ve ever heard, spoke.
“Sun?” asked the Witch. “What is this ‘sun’ that you speak of? I’ve never heard of such a thing.” As she spoke, she glided off the slightly elevated runway and over to the fire behind the shocked announcer. The Witch took a handful of green powder from her pocket and threw it onto the fire, then began to play the instrument in her hands.
“There is no such thing as a sun,” she cooed sweetly.
“Of course,” muttered the enchanted announcer. “How could we have thought so? There is no sun.”
“Everyone, hear what this fine gentleman says,” said the Lady in a soothing voice. “There is no sun.”
“There is no sun,” chanted the room full of reporters and photographers, their cameras abandoned. And all the while this was happening, the mandolin continued its thrumming.
“Now why don’t you discard these childish stories and get some sleep,” uttered the triumphant Witch quietly.
Everyone fell over in deep slumber. The fashion show ended abruptly. THE END.
Don’t forget to check out the winners of the last contest.