Lily's NaPo 2023

[Lily of Archenland]

A Rabbit Quest (haiku)
4/14/23

Catastrophe's rise
Pushes brave seekers forth
To a green new home.

[Lily of Archenland]

Kindred Spirits
4/15/23

We were just children,
Sunburn on our shoulders,
Seeking connection
With someone our age.
Two hearts on fire
In a hotbed of zealots,
Debating books and music
After a sudden embrace.
Oh, we were children,
Thought we were so grown-up;
Heads frothing with thinking
Denied and dismissed.
Sand-castle dreams,
Hoped or feared predestination;
Eager to be authors,
Brief island of bliss.
We both wore such shadows
Over those shoulders,
One-pieces, camp tee shirts,
And struggles at home.
Our sisters conspired
And inspired a chance meeting,
The spark struck at greeting
Came aflame as we roamed.

---

The One Good Thing
4/15/23

You were my luckiest accident.
What would I do without you?
Almost a chance encounter,
Far from home, stars were right.
I was clueless, no intent
To stumble on a bond so true,
Deeper hopes rose up in chatter,
Lonely souls who longed for light.
If those years beneath blue stained glass
And red brick gave me nothing
But your summer-bright smile
And a ticket to your door,
In the melancholy as I pass
The bulk of memory looming,
I could sing all the while
Because I had your love in store.

[Lily of Archenland]

Youth Pastors
4/16/23

I cared for you, perhaps parasocially;
Saw you as doors to reach a holier place.
I longed for your approval as I sought God's love and grace,
Danced to the tunes you played on our puppet strings,
All flash, charisma and lights, and the drum in my heartbeat.
Who anointed your authority?
You had crowd appeal, a little Bible school,
And more time in the school of hard knocks.
The blunt-spoken country boy
Ex-bullrider and his cheerleader beloved
Moved among impassioned teens
With the glow of celebrity.
You egged us on to competition and to God, I think, near equally.
I got high on it. And every Thursday morning came the crash,
The rollercoaster of the band and daydreamed visions fading out,
And a cooler head left to fight to understand
How to find a practical path for living.
Did I want a vocation,
Or friends and hope and adulation?
What was prophecy, what was fantasy,
And what was me channeling my broken head?
I wanted a savior, and you gave me church instead.

[Lily of Archenland]

When Bookshelves Look Like Hope
[4/17/23]

Someday we'll have a library -
Y'all and me, and maybe her.
We'll blend up our tastes and wonder,
And spread them over shelves together;
Browse each other's treasured things,
But only with permission.
We'll need room to store
The loads of books we love.
They'll be heavy in the boxes
Coming in to our house,
But the weight will be so worth it.
We might prune our stacks a little,
To lighten the load,
But we'll keep the ones shelved deepest
In our hearts and memories.
All my poetry is staying.
So is the brave young child
Facing fearful fay and secret doors;
I read her on the way to my Grandpa's funeral
And she was signed by my ex's alter.
The most beautiful illustrations
Must stay too, for the awe
And curiosity they raise
In my innermost artist.
Little sis will surely bring
The unexpected enchantress
And misunderstood evil wood,
She has read at least six times
Since it came in on her birthday.
And she still protects the battered
Memory, equestrian adventure
And desert quest
From a long-gone childhood haven.
Our eldest has theology in spades,
School linguistics she could never quite let go,
And a spread of children's classics
She saves up for her new family,
In case she ever finds it.
What might our friend bring in?
She loves books, but doesn't keep as many -
Which does she love most deeply?
I want to see them all,
Standing proudly in a safe place;
When all the books in sight are ours,
I'll know I've found a home.

[Lily of Archenland]

There was a short story I read once, and haven't been able to find again since. It was about a mostly-human monster girl who was trying to pass in the human world, until she accidentally broke the masquerade for a human doctor boyfriend who decided all monsters were things to be "cured" until they could fit in with humans, and who learned to embrace her uniqueness as she went to save her more obviously-monstrous little sister from his clutches. This poem is for that lost short story, and for all of us who sometimes feel too strange to belong...
---
Breaking My Masquerade
4/20/23

I will be weird and wild,
With or without permission.
You cannot amputate
My idiosyncrasies.
For myself, I may file down my horns
To mask my shadow for your world,
But if you come for my sisters
I will rise with tooth and claw.
My love will set my heart on fire
Until I cannot play your games.
I am a child of wonder,
At home in deep dark caves.
I'm willing that we coexist,
But I won't pretend to be the same.

[Lily of Archenland]

The Worst Recipe
4/21/23

My heart is simmering shame
On the back burner,
And it's stinking up the house.
But I cannot lift it,
It is too heavy for me alone.
All the things I haven't done
And should do,
Wishes left so long unattended
They are rankling unfulfilled,
Chopped like vegetables
In a stew.
The smell makes me ill,
I cannot pull myself together.
Please take me away from here.

---

Head in the Clouds
4/21/23

Rainbow paint is the stickiest sort,
As the Centipede learned on the flying peach.
Don't step between artists and their art
Or soon you'll be frozen on your feet.
Tread among cloud-palaces with care,
My friend, while the folk with their muses
Are all in a flurry,
And if you think to linger,
Just remember,
That wonders won't let you leave in a hurry.

[Lily of Archenland]

Where Dryads meet the Hope of Glory
4/22/23

Brother River, Sister Tree
Star Cousins singing silver in the sky;
Guardians and little spirits, let it be
We seek our Parent, finding why
We play our part in season's song and dance.
Made for love and wonder, we will roam
Through the strangest fractal tapestry,
Embracing interlinked particularity
Until a new world opens, as if by chance
And every Springtime finds its way back home.

[Lily of Archenland]

Long-distance
4/23/23

A thousand gentle feelers of connection
Branch out through mechanical minds.
My heartstrings splay out in extension
Along aetherial ties that bind
Me to my knowledge of all of you.
I glow golden with joy,
Though my face is lit in monitor blue.
Such power we've found, for good or ill!
We weave cyber networks of community.
From far away, I can care for you still
In many small ways minus proximity.
My words, my art, my listening ears
Still matter in spite of a world so large.
We can shelter and comfort from fears
And the swirl of circumstance's barrage.

[Lily of Archenland]

[Skipping my bonus one from yesterday because I think it dealt topically with some less g-rated issues.]

The Long Goodbye
4/24/23

I going to build a life without you,
Though I wouldn't choose to lose you.
You were interwoven into almost every part of me.
The way you spiraled and cut ties with loved ones was a tragedy.
But somehow I will take these threads,
The jewel tones from both our heads -
All I learned from your aspirations
And your failures;
Precious citizens of dreaming nations,
Fears and pleasures -
And I'll weave them into something new.
I will use the memories,
And build ruins into something true.

[Lily of Archenland]

Bonsai Apples
[4/24/23]

I used to feel proud on behalf

Of a bonsai apple tree.

If it could bear fruit I could too,

No matter how small I might be.

But sometimes it may be no sin,

To rest and take the easy path. 

My branch is small and frail within,

Roots still reaching for what's true.

Apples are heavy when you're trying to be.

Perhaps I cannot fruit till I am free.