Lily's NaPo 2023

[Lily of Archenland]

Susan's Second Adolescence
4/25/23

Of course we don't react the same
When our throne's a broken memory,
And the golden dream vanishes
In the cold grey English morning.
My kind and practical girl,
You wore your shining flowers
With gentleness and grace,
And tried to lead the best you could
While kingdoms sought your hand.
You've been a woman grown before,
And you want to be one among the cobblestones
Just as you were in the forests.
It's just the rules are different here.
Is it abandonment to move forward
Once the door has closed behind you?
Do you paint yourself into a fantasy,
Or make up with battle armor?

[Lily of Archenland]

I Found Rest in You
4/27/23

This city might not be my home, but you are,
I thought as I lay beside you on your bed.
My nerves constrained me from exploring far,
But I found peace and joy in a narrow room
While your soft dark eyes could gaze into my head.
You bought my path to freedom while I brooded in the gloom.

In your love I found the joy in a place where I'll never live.
Springtime sang to me although the flowers were strange.
Bookstores and birdsongs and four-footed friends could give
More than a touch of wonder,
As we wandered while the seasons changed,
And fog lifted and left me free to ponder.

[Lily of Archenland]

Editing
4/27/23

I always pare down my edges for acceptability.
Who I'm talking to only determines how severely.
Everyone has their limits, even in therapy.
I'd like it better if you'd just tell me openly.
How much of me is too big for you?
What's overshare, what are your boundaries?
When am I likely to leave the path of safety?
Don't pretend your love is so true
I could tell you anything.
I've been burned that way before, when I took them literally.

[Lily of Archenland]

May the Good Times Last
4/27/23

Please don't leave me,
Please don't go away.
Please don't be the next one
On the list of broken dreams.
I'm so ashamed to beg,
But I'd love for you to stay.
We have adopted you so thoroughly.
Even my folks believe you're family.
Reminders of you flash joyfully
On many facets of my life.
I see your work in my library,
Your joy in shared myths and dreams.
I see you in the yarn aisle at the craft shop.
You're smiling at my side in every gleam of amethyst.
I want you in my birthdays, in my weekdays, in the moments I can still praise
A Lord we both love though we see him differently.
I fear fracture lines I've met in other folk before.
I hope I am always at home at your door,
And if you want, someday you could live with me.

[Lily of Archenland]

A Love-poem from The Strays and Rescues
[4/30/23]

Sometimes love walks up to your door
On four feet.
Sometimes you find that it only needed
A kind hand to meet,
A bowl of food to fill its belly,
A place to play with joy
And sleep in peace.
We walk among brief wonders,
Shining sparks of lives
Clad in their whiskers.
The lifespan of a love
Is often so much shorter than our own.
But it still lived.
It prowled and capered,
Listened to what you had to say
Even lacking a common language,
Mirrored your happy moments
And faithfully watched your door.
Love matters, even if it cannot last.
Love matters, even while you know it's temporary.

----

Letter to the Field
[4/30/23]

This is a poem for the seeds,
Scattered and flying and falling.
I'm not sure I believe in fated meetings.
The hand that threw you high
Might be divine or it might be my own;
But oh, my pleasure at the roots you've grown.
I cannot see into the heart of things,
And I know as the old tale goes
(Although in rather different context):
Sometimes the soil may be too shallow
For a friendship to take deep root.
It must shoot up and flair with flowers,
And quickly wither once we pass each other's spheres.
Some seeds though they may long to bond with soil
Are still found by the birds of cruel chance,
Or strangled out by thorns when they have once begun to grow.
But sometimes -
Glad and hopeful times -
They last the years, and we can spring up
Together, watch each other change and bloom,
And reap one another's harvest of extraordinary dreams.
Dear ones, whether in my old walled garden
Or growing somewhere free and wild:
May we be fierce and sturdy together
As dandelions against the dark.