Monthly Archives: August 2016

Narnialympics 2016: Day 9

Between the storm that continued from Day 8 and then the feasting following the Closing Ceremonies, we have another late report.

Audiences at home will be relieved to know that King Caspian X of Narnia did not suffer a concussion from his fall on Day 8 after all.

The storm that spooked his mount intensified the next day, delaying the final event of this year’s Narnialympics: aerial acrobatics. This event is somewhat similar to gymnastics, but for winged contestants (Talking Birds, Winged Horses, dragons, etc.). A miniature obstacle course is set mid-air for the athletes to perform around in a choreography of their choosing. As the event is open to a variety of winged creatures, there is always something new to see as each species has its own advantages and disadvantages, ranging in size, limb types, and skeletal flexibility.

The winner of the bronze medal is a dragon of unclear origins. Some say his is from as far east as Dragon Island, but according to King Edmund and Queen Lucy of Narnia, he is from a place called “Cambridge”. The dragon seemed to agree to the latter point of origin and tried to write out something in the sand, but between his scrawled writing, the accidental sweeps of his tail, and the ocean waves, the most we got from him directly was this (the ellipses marking where his writing was obscured):


Regardless of his origins, this dragon has earned his bronze medal with his powerful performance. The rate at which he gained his altitude was impressive and he made excellent use of his tail in his triple-ring twist. Unfortunately, he went a little too far in making an impression, for his fire-breathing set a couple of the props on fire.

Coming in second was Fledge of Narnia, father of all winged horses. Though his performance was more than admirable for his skill in flight, Fledge clearly appealed to all the horse-lovers in the audience, incorporating a toss of his mane here, a rearing up there, and a wild whinny at the end of it all. Of these decisions, Fledge merely stated, “I was born a simple country horse before Aslan gave me wings. I still love a good gallop or a roll or a lump of sugar as much as any other horse, and I wanted to reflect in my performance those simple joys as only a Horse can have.”

Taking home the final gold of this tournament is the Chief Gryphon of Narnia. His inclusion of his many battle-born maneuvers brought a fresh meaning to the word “dynamic”. While the dragon’s performance was an artful dance and Fledge’s was a new level of “wild and free”, the Chief Gryphon’s choreography was nothing short of passionate. With his leonine grace and eagle-like swiftness, one could easily envision a battle raging about him as he wheeled and dove and somersaulted in and around the obstacle course. A close battle to be sure, but the Chief Gryphon emerged the undisputed victor of the event.

Thank you for following these special reports with Azim Balda Broadcasting and we hope you’ll join us four years from now for the 2020 Narnialympics Tournament!

Narnialympics 2016: Day 8

Can you believe the Narnialympics are nearly over?! Just one day more to go! Ariel_of_Narnia with Azim Balda Broadcasting here to bring you the results of today’s event.

Unlike all the other events this year, we had the pleasure of seeing a team sport: equestrian jumping. The rules of the event dictate that each horse must have a rider; this prevents Talking Horses of Narnia – as well as Unicorns and Centaurs – from competing as a single entity. (For obvious reasons, Winged Horses are not permitted to enter at all.) Some amount of controversy has always surrounded this event regarding dumb horses and Talking Horses, but regardless of whether a horse is Talking or dumb, both horse and rider must learn to read each other.

Today was stormy, driving the event to take place in a covered arena. Such a trivial fact as weather has not appeared in my reports prior to this, but I bring it up as a point of fairness to certain disappointed contestants who would have performed well otherwise. One such contestant was King Caspian X of Narnia, whose horse threw him when it spooked at a clap of thunder. King Caspian X his his head quite hard and medics have expressed the possibility of a concussion.

Taking the bronze this tournament are King Tirian and Jewel the Unicorn of Narnia, both of whom attribute their excellent performance to their long friendship and many experiences on the battlefield. They were serious contenders for gold, but despite Jewel’s natural grace, it was King Tirian’s brief moments of rough riding that brought down their score.

Winning his second medal – again silver – was Prince Cor of Archenland. Though he had proven unwilling to comment on his entry in the swordplay contest, Prince Cor did allow for a brief interview before the contest today, wherein he revealed that nearly all of his riding skill was learned from a Talking Horse – namely, Bree of Narnia – and that he has only recently become comfortable with dumb horses. Well, he certainly had us fooled! Prince Cor was at one with his mount and rode marvellously, even making the difficult jumps appear easy. Archenland now knows that their crown prince will represent them very well in tournaments to come!

Our gold medalists are Queen Lucy and Hwin of Narnia. Their acquaintance has been shorter than one might expect for such an excellent team and indeed, they seem to have been something of an impromptu team, having largely trained separately from what we understand. Queen Lucy is an enthusiastic rider with and excellent seat – in her words, “in part, I’m sure, because of the day Aslan sailed over the battlements of the White Witch’s castle!” Hwin spoke of how she desired to compete after she had spent some time back in Narnia from her long sojourn in Calormen. Before even acquiring a rider, she was already training herself daily to “work off her extra inches from soft Narnian living” and to improve her times and skill.

(An extra tidbit for those in our audience who enjoy a good mystery: earlier today, Bree the Horse, bronze medalist in high jump and gold medalist in the 100-meter dash, visited Hwin to offer her some encouragement, departing with a wink and a reminder to “Think ‘lion’!” We are still no closer to understanding the meaning of Bree’s fascination with – and motivation of – lions, but at least we now know that this secret is shared by Bree, Hwin, Prince Cor of Archenland, and Aravis Tarkheena of Archenland.)

Only one day left to go!

For live coverage of the 2016 Narnialympics, please join us here on our games thread!

Narnialympics 2016: Day 7

Between the one-hundred-meter dash and the speed of our sprinters, it has been proven that, though we are nearing the end of the Narnialympics 2016, the pace is not letting up! I’m Ariel_of_Narnia coming to you live from Bernstead, Avra.

Few men dared to enter this event, leaving it to the various creatures of Narnia: Dryads, Centaurs, and Talking Beasts. Despite this, the stands were filled with Narnians and non, creatures and men alike, all of them cheering on their favoured athletes.

Our bronze medalist this year is a Talking Leopard. He has not released his name, but some believe he is one of the Leopards who once bore Aslan’s crown and standard, based on the stoic calm that blanketed all indication of emotion but for the tautening of his muscles and the twitching of his tail. Whether or not this identification proves true or not, many artists have declared their interest in painting the Leopard’s portrait!

Outrunning the Leopard by just a hair was one Chervy the Stag, who once ran a message from the foot of Mount Pire to Cair Paravel in record time. One has only to see how he bounds forward, hooves hardly touching the track, to believe the account of his heroism. From the cheers of his fans from both Narnia and Archenland, it would seem that Chervy has found his calling as a Narnialympic athlete.

And finally, the gold medal goes to our high-jump bronze medalist and surprise winner, Bree the Horse! Bree thundered ahead of his competitors and crossed the finish line a full two seconds before Chervy the Stage. In addition to this, his coach declared that the retired war Horse set a new personal record on the track. When asked about this achievement, Bree responded, “I train myself to be in top form, but it isn’t until I get on the track that I truly give it my all. No, it is no great secret: I simply imagine myself being chased by a great lion. It has proven to be an effective motivator in the past.” However, when asked to elaborate on this point, Bree seemed embarrassed and politely refused to comment. Curiously, shouts of “Remember you’re a war horse!” and “I did think we were safe from lions here!” were heard from Bree’s biggest fans, none other than Prince Cor and Aravis Tarkeena of Archenland, both of whom likewise refused to comment. Though we are left to speculate as to the meaning of this, the results are irrefutable.

For live coverage of the 2016 Narnialympics, please join us here on our games thread!

Narnialympics 2016: Days 5 & 6

An event so filled with competitors, it took two days to complete! This is Ariel_of_Narnia with Azim Balda Broadcasting here to relate to you the exciting highlights of the swordplay event!

Due to the dragon attack mentioned in my last report, there were a handful of competitors who were ordered by Narnialympic medics to sit on the sidelines this year. Despite this, each nation had plenty of representatives in the event: soldiers, nobles, and even a high number of royals.

As they have in every year of the Narnialympics, the king-brothers of Narnia, High King Peter and King Edmund, entered the event side by side. Both have won medals in tournaments past and were among the favourites of Narnia, along with their General Oreius. Another notable athlete from Narnia was none other than Sir Reepicheep, already winner of two medals this year! To the tune of his chanting fans, Sir Reepicheep performed superbly, but in the end, even his small size and expert acrobatics could not compensate for his inability to parry effectively. General Oreius, on the other end, lacked Sir Reepicheep’s finesse, but made up for it with the brute force a Centaur his size can utilize. King Edmund showed exceptional skill in disarming his opponents with a couple tricks of the hand. The High King Peter has maintained his reputation for being quick on his feet, but was forced to withdraw following an injury in the ring.

High King Peter’s injury occurred during his match with King Miraz of Telmarine Narnia, who proved an imposing presence in the ring, making great use of his size and weight against the majority of his opponents. Surprise at his improved skill has been expressed by many of the onlookers, even from amongst King Miraz’ fellow Telmarines.

This year has also seen another royal join the ranks of sword-wielding contestants: Prince Cor of Archenland. The crown prince did not make himself open to any questions regarding his entry in the tournament. King Lune would only say that he would allow the swordplay speak for itself. Prince Cor’s twin, Prince Corin, proved to be the most informative when he described his brother’s swordplay as “dangerous”. Looking at Prince Cor’s face in the hours leading up to his first round, many took his brother’s words to be an exaggeration, for Prince Cor was the picture of calm. The moment he set foot in the ring, however, his eyes took on a hard light, the only warning apart from Prince Corin’s of the truly dangerous skill that followed.

Two days of duels finally boiled down to the following results: bronze to King Miraz of Telmarine Narnia, silver to Prince Cor of Archenland – the first Archenlander to win a medal this year, and who looks to be a highly-favoured contender next tournament -, and gold to General Oreius of Narnia.

For live coverage of the 2016 Narnialympics, please join us here on our games thread!

Narnialympics 2016: Day Four

This is Ariel_of_Narnia with Azim Balda Broadcasting. Audiences at home may have heard by now that on the fourth day of the Narnialympics, Bernstead was briefly attacked by a dragon. The best and bravest of each nation rallied together to ward off the beast, and all are safe and accounted for. Several injuries have been sustained; physicians have ordered a handful of athletes to withdraw from the tournament. Clean-up continues, but officials announced late last night that the games would resume.

Now, I bring you the results of the archery event that occurred just a few hours prior to the dragon attack.

So many athletes entered the event, the crowd of those awaiting their turns formed a veritable army! The contest was close and the judges had a long, heated discussion before the three winners were finally announced.

After the controversy of Doctor Cornelius’ use of magic in the high jump event, we hardly expected another so soon. One particular female centaur, who has not released her name, had chosen to fire a flaming arrow, but to everyone’s surprise, it burst mid-air and released a phoenix! The target burned straightaway when the phoenix made contact, but one Farsight the Eagle was able to confirm the perfect score. This caused a stir amongst the other archers, a number of whom called for the Centaur’s disqualification as there were two contestants at play. The Centaur responded to these protestations with a reminder that no specifications were given on the types of arrows that may or may not be used. This was the largest of the controversies the judges faced in this event, but they chose to award her with the bronze medal with no comment regarding the decision.

Another surprise for the judges came in the form of Ilugumuth Tarkaan of Calormen. Already distinguishable by his twisted lip, Ilugumuth Tarkaan had a different approach to the sport. Rather than aim as soon as he stepped up, he stood still, sizing up the target, as it were. Then, in a smooth succession of movements, he raise his bow, drew his arrow back, and let it fly with hardly any evidence of aiming. Though his form was unusual, it may be that it was a factor in the forces that knocked the target backward, though there has been some debate over this as the Tarkaan’s face expressed as much surprise as everyone else’s. The judges deliberated over this occurrence, but in the end named him the silver medalist.

The gold medal went to Narnia’s favourite in the event, her majesty Queen Susan herself. To ensure that she used an ordinary bow, rather than the magical one she had received from Father Christmas, the bow was inspected prior to her entry onto the field. With the grace and poise of the stately queen she is, Queen Susan’s form was excellent, her movements were steady, and her shot made with confidence. Moreover, she neither burned nor moved the target!


For live coverage of the 2016 Narnialympics, please join us here on our games thread!